Kissing Kousins
Hey. Just woke up from an afternoon-long nap. Had some pretty strange dreams, but the one that struck me the most as both horrifying and meaningful was the one I had about my first-cousin Jon, who just graduated from high school. As you all know, Jon's older brother Mike got married last month. I hadn't seen either of my cousins for some time before then. Anywho. So here's the dream: I'm in Vermillion. We're in this hotel, totally unlike any of the hotels in Vermillion because it has a waterpark in it. The people there are not really important to list, though it is primarily family members. None of MY friends are there, let's put it that way. So I'm with Mike's wife, Colleen. I'm wearing a wedding dress. It is white (for now--later it changes color, don't let me forget) and from what I can tell from my limited periferal vision, pretty. I am absolutely confused because it was like a Quantum Leap dream. You know...one moment you know where you are and what you are doing and then the next you're in someone else's body and have no clue what the hell is going on. It was strange.
Anyway, so I'm talking to Colleen. We're partying it up because, for all I know, I'm at a costume party and we've come as the brides. (interjection: I don't know...it was a dream, ok?) Next thing I know, people are telling me that we're going to be late and I'm shoved into a kind of crap old DeVille (gray/silver with rust spots and a faded/torn cloth covered roof). I'm being rushed to the Vermillion Middle School, where I'm guessing the wedding is supposed to be. It is taking a long time to get from the hotel to the middle school, as if it were not really in Vermillion, but it is. The whole way I'm looking really confused and trying to politely ask or skillfully find out who I'm supposed to be marrying. Since I'm drunk, I can't hear surrounding conversation well and my speak is not slurred, but slow. I finally give up on trying to figure it out nicely, and start panicking. I ask Colleen, "So...who AM I marrying?" She looks at me with such incredulity (sp?) and I feel so ashamed, but I can't help it. She says, "You're marrying Double Wide!" I'm thinking...
who is "Double Wide"? And that's all I can get from her. Soon, I'm just going crazy and somehow get the driver to stop a block away from the middle school (not on Cherry, but the street on the other side of it, with all the homes, that leads to Austin school). I get out and start walking. There are lots of people out on their front lawns, which is strange because by this time, it is getting a bit dark outside, either like it is going to rain or the sun has already set. I'm walking and then realize that even if I have no idea who I'm marrying, I should at least be respectful enough to keep the dress from getting torn and ruined, so I gather up the train and most of the skirt in my arms. Now my dress is a strange 70s shade of orange-yellow, with the skirt having wide horizontal black stripes. ???
My mind is racing and I'm striding away from the middle school as fast as possible. Side note: I remember feeling much taller in this dream than I am in real life, so my legs have longer strides. It hits me. The only person I know, that Colleen and Mike would know who is nicknamed "Double Wide" is Jon, my cousin. (Which in real life, they call him no such thing, even though he IS a big boy, but it's because he is over 6' and is VERY muscled.) I am shocked and appalled that 1) no one else seems to think that first-cousins getting married is the least bit strange, and that 2) I am having a dream about marrying my first cousin. At this point my real life mind is hoping the dream at least doesn't make it to the wedding
night. I'm absolutely horrified--and then something weird comes over me and I know that I have to go through with it. That I have to stand in front of all these people and say "I do" and "'till death do us part". I just have to...and now there is no doubt in my mind what I will do. In my mind, I am preparing myself to make a life-long sacrifice for the happiness of my cousin. I tell myself over and over that I love him and that I didn't really have any other plans anyway, and that maybe if I can manipulate him successfully, without his or anyone else's detection, that he will be the one asking for the divorce and then I will be free. But I convinced myself that marrying him was the right thing to do, even though in my heart I felt sick and desolate.
Then I woke up. I had some more dreams after that about being a Jounin and teaching Genins about exploding tags and then a dream about having sex with Dave in a bathtub while my parents were in the living room (that one was quite nice) and then one about a friend I used to have way back in middle school (Lisa McCreery) and a petty $14.35. Hm. Yes. So that is all really. I didn't do much else today other than grocery shop and put together the doggy baricade for my bedroom. I am trying to make stuff out of all the leftovers I have in the fridge. Now that Nailz isn't home, I always have at least two servings left over, whereas I would normally only have one or less left from a four serving meal. *sighs* Well, I guess this means that I won't have to cook on the hot nights when (not if) they return.
To my friends who leave for Lillies tomorrow (though I know they won't get to read this until they come back): Have a good time.
Confession: Even though it doesn't really interest me, each year I feel a little left out, as everyone always comes back with "inside" jokes and stories of people I don't know doing...stuff that would probably be fun. *shakes head* I guess that's why I don't
beg to hear about it. It's like telling your friend who just broke both his legs, how great it is to swim when it's hot out.