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Sunday, June 08, 2008

the devil i know is starting to look awfully kind

Ah~... So I am back in the old apato. Back to "normal" life. Not so sure what that is. I feel like I don't fit. It has only been a couple of days and I know re-adjustment takes a long time. They say for every 12 months you are gone, it takes 3 months to reintegrate into your normal life. I don't want to wait 3 months to feel normal. I will try to be patient with myself, but I'm don't know how.

I am tempted to procrastinate on the goals that I had made for myself when I came home again. Feeling like I don't fit makes me want to just hide for a while and not go outside. I suppose it doesn't help that I need to decide when I'm going to return to my job and it is a job I don't necessarily like - though maybe it has changed since last year...

I feel awkward and confused about most things. I'm a stranger in my own life. It is disconcerting.

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