i'm not proud to need a hand, but i just don't understand at all*
1006 hrs:*looks pointedly at time* I will get back to this next time, but for now - I must write about an epiphany that I've had.
It is hard to express. It feels like I should write the whole stream of consciousness that led to this realization. It's been niggling in the back of my mind for so long - just out of reach - until now. Like most humans, I like to feel needed - not used or taken for granted. If someone
needs my help, I don't mind. In fact, it even gives me a certain amount of pleasure to help someone I love who is in need - even if it means a sacrifice on my part. BUT - if I feel obligated to do something that is not a need for someone and end up doing it when they are perfectly capable of doing it themselves, that's when I get irked. Also, if someone I love needs help with something, but doesn't want my help or input, it is frustrating because I
want to help them and feel a bit hurt, too.
Does that make sense?
Also, this morning I realized something else. I realized that although I pride myself on being an "independent" adult and perfectly capable of taking care of myself, there are times when one needs another. As much as I sometimes like to think of myself as completely self-sufficient and needing no one else, it is simply not true. There are some things that are beyond my control (I know - stunning isn't it??).
I think that logically, I've always known these things, but never emotionally realized them. I wonder if this will change my attitude a little bit from here on out when interacting with those all around me who have always "been there" for me, and maybe always just taken for granted.
1402 hrs:Ah so. A brief re-cap of this morning's events: Nailz's car wouldn't start, so we tried to jump start it - no luck, so I drove Nailz to work and will be picking her up after work. I'm hoping that it was just too cold for it to start. I'm sure Nailz hopes this is the case as well. A cow-orker of mine gave me some ideas of things to try though, so hopefully we can try some of them tonight or this weekend. It might just be easiest to "car-pool" tomorrow morning and then work on her car this weekend, as it is predicted to be 32 degrees on Sunday. (Like Nailz said, I'll believe it when I feel it!)
1609 hrs:Pop Quiz:
Q: What's better than free food?
A: Free catered food.
Working late tonight to make up for this morning, but better get going. The last 45 minutes are going to fly by...
Labels: cow-orkers, highly-caffeinated, weather, work