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Monday, July 08, 2013

yesterday

July 3, 2013 (水)
Q: What was the last beach you went to?
A: Lake beach = Lake Toya this past weekend.  Sea/Ocean beach = Black Sand Beach near Yakumo.

July 4, 2013 (木)
Q: _____________ is funny.
A: Narita-kun. He's always making me smile and laugh.

July 5, 2013 (金)
Q: What is your motto?
A: I guess I don't have one. Maybe "slow and steady wins the race"?

July 6, 2013 (土)
Q: Who is your best friend?
A: Nailz, of course, but I count myself very lucky to have a few really great friends besides.

July 7, 2013 (日)
Q: What's the next book you want to read?
A: I'd have to look at my Good Reads account to decide from the list.

July 8, 2013 (月)
Q: What do you have to lose?
A: A lot, actually. There has almost never been a time when the answer would be "nothing".

Random Ramble:
I got the crazy idea to ask out one of my Japanese co-workers about 3 weeks ago after a couple months of increasingly intense office flirting.  I had been putting it off since then, but last Friday I finally did it. To my surprise (because I always expect failure to be the result), he said "yes" right away.  I was kind of over-the-moon for a while there. I mean, it's been a really long time since I've asked someone to go out with me and they've said yes.

I did have my suspicions later, though, that maybe he would find a way to bail on me. His perma-grin started to fade and he started avoiding talking to me in the office even though I did my best to engage him as normally as he would allow. Today my suspicions were confirmed - he will indeed be bailing on me. 

I won't hide that this co-worker happens to be 11 years my junior. Once again, I am reminded of how humiliating it is to be pushed away by a much younger man. Of course, on the outside I feel like swaggering and saying "huh, well he's really missing out - I am HOT stuff!", but in reality, I feel like I've stupidly sullied my pride.  The mantra of "I should have known better" is on repeat in my head.

My feelings aren't hurt, but my pride is smarting a bit...

P.S. Click on the title for today's ear worm and source of the post title.

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