and yet still i wish i could dream as when youngAh. So I am feeling apathetic and kind of down today. I have been listening to depressing songs all day. I listened to NEWS's "Ai Nante" many times today. It makes my heart ache listening to it - like I have grown apart from someone I really loved. This, of course, is ridiculous because I haven't been "in love" for a
long time. It really has been 6 years since my last serious relationship. I've dated since then and even had a few online romances, but nothing serious or where it lasted long or affected me beyond normal break-up blues. Isn't it strange how music can touch your heart like that? Affect you so much, you feel as if you could have written the lyrics?
Anywho - because of this apathy, I didn't really do much today and can't even really decide if I want to eat or not. I've had a few bites to eat of random things, but have no desire to make anything or go out either. I like just staying in, even if it means that I don't eat.
I think part of all this hermit-like behavior is part of my readjustment. I just feel more comfortable when I don't have to worry about going somewhere and putting on something other than PJs or sweats in order to do it. And I don't have to worry about spending money when I am home. It is just nice to
be for a while. Pretty soon I will be heading down to South Dakota to see my friends and family and while I know it will be fun - I think it will be difficult for me to actually get moving and on the road when I am supposed to.
Well, guess that's about it. Not much else happening. I might actually blog a lot in the next couple of months, so I apologize in advance. :]
Labels: complete ramble, random